At 4.AM the next morning after a few hours of restless and uncomfortable sleep, I woke to the unfamiliar sounds of the hospital ward. I looked across and saw my beautiful little girl fast asleep with her mouth open and her wee legs hanging through the gaps in the cot. For a second it actually made me giggle and then the realisation of why she was lying there came back. I then felt guilty for having a giggle, I felt guilty for not being able to protect her from this, and I felt guilty that I hadn't noticed. What kind of mother was I? The guilt swamped my body in an unbearable physical weight and unable to move by it, I lay there crying silently to myself until my head felt like it was going to burst and my throat was sore from trying to contain my sobs. I lifted my phone and frantically scrolled through every picture I had of Maisie desperately looking to see if I could find the lump in any of them. Even though we had been informed that with the type of tumour they suspected Maisi...