Raising Maisie May

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The feeling of Christmas.

As the festive season gets on its way and peoples plans, decorations and big ideas for the Christmas period comes to light, I am reminding myself not to get caught up with trying to "keep up with the Clauses." Over the years the pressure to have personalised Christmas eve boxes, handmade advent calendars, a perfectly decorated house, and visits to the most expensive Santa's grottos is growing, and its easy to get caught up in it all. The season can bring so much stress and panic to fulfil all 'the must do's' and its easy to loose sight of what really matters. Last year I was humbly reminded of what is truly important to me and what makes Christmas so special. And it is definitely not the neatly wrapped presents or the perfect wine and cheese board. It was this.... It was her little face. And more than that, it was the 'feeling' I got in the depths of my heart when I looked at her. Having her with us and being able to enjoy the run up to Chri...

SHE DID IT!!!!

As we entered the month of December, with Christmas just around the corner, conversations everywhere were about Christmas presents, Santa lists, buying this and buying that, wishing for this thing and hoping for that thing. As children wrote their lists and posted them off to Santa with a sure belief and faith that they would receive what they wanted on Christmas morning, I wished with all my heart that it could be that simple for us. Dear Santa, I have been the very best girl this year. I was strong even when my body was weak, I was brave even when I had every reason to be scared, I smiled every day and I made my mummy and daddy very proud of me. All I want for Christmas this year is to be cancer free, I have fought so hard and the gift of my health and my future would be really good. If I could also get my broviac line removed from my chest and be allowed an actual bath with all the bubbles I could handle, that would a...

Life isn't always perfect, but your outfit can be!!!

Sometimes, when things are hard and seeming hopeless, its difficult to see beyond what you are facing, like things will never change and it will never get better. I've been there many times over the past year and its a dark and scary place. But, there is a little saying that I've told myself a hundred times since becoming a mother and I know I will tell myself it a hundred times more over the coming years, and its this..."this too shall pass." Because nothing lasts forever. On the morning of Tuesday 14th November I woke with a sense of disbelief. I couldn't quite believe that we had reached this day, that it had come, it was here and we were about to live it. Just another day to most people I'm sure, but to us it was a day that was so significant, so defining, and so important to Maisie's' journey and her life. Today was to be the end. Today was to be her last chemotherapy treatment. I woke her from her slumber that morning and I held her ...

The promise of change.

Seasons are a marker of time. They are a sign of change, growth, of giving way to new life, and a comfort in knowing that as one season ends another one simply begins. As our summer came to an end so did the warm days, the long bright nights and the fully blossomed trees, giving way to cooler temperatures, different colours and a promise that things were going to be different. I was hoping that as the leaves of summer began to change, crisp and fall away, so would the isolation and restrictions of chemotherapy. You see, this new season was promising more than cool cosy nights with Autumn coloured leaves. For us, it was signalling the beginning of the end of Maisie's treatment. We started the month of October counting down in single figures the weeks we had left to endure this way of life, hoping with all of our might that we would reach that final day. So with this being our focus and me having the good old saying of "when life gives you lemons, make lemo...